Quietly freaking out about what the future may hold

It’s October, so it must be that time of year when I freak out about the future, to stay in Indonesia or not, to seek another career option, or simply maintain what I’ve been doing for so long now.

It doesn’t help that the American economy has been thrown in the canal, nor that the Indonesian economy is now heading towards possible turmoil as well.

It doesn’t help ease my mind to hear from expat friends and ex-coworkers who are less than happy back in the States. One particularly close friend was happy to jump ship (and rub it in my face that I was staying) and head back to America, and yet three years later is pining to get back… to Jakarta!? Citing that “America is just so… effing boring. Nothing new. At least in Indo there was a new adventure every day.”

It doesn’t help that my sister, who thought her wanderlust would be cured in a year of stomping around Southeast Asia and Australia, is completely ready to stay overseas. Or that my father says, “It’s time for you to come home.” Or that my brother lives in Tokyo.

This certainly isn’t the first time I’ve been struggling with these thoughts of what the future may hold, or have had to come to grips with the fact that your close friends leaving, is just part of this lifestyle. Those of you that have been dropping by for a while may remember my ‘Quarter Life Crisis‘ (which has gently eased into third-life).

I’ve actually been more calm and casual than usual in this regard, even prompting friends to ask, “Aren’t you worried?”. Perhaps this is just the quiet before the storm.